Day 6 Letter

Hey you,

You think it's okay to look at me and judge me. Because of people like you, I feel like I have to be so damn careful about myself. Because of people like you, I used to hate myself and where I came from. Do you know what it's like to feel like you're not good enough because of how you look? To feel like you're not worthy. Because of people like you, I have to write a damn book, and honestly, that wouldn't even be difficult BECAUSE OF PEOPLE LIKE YOU. I understand that you must feel pain, or hear things constantly, a coping mechanism for things you don't understand, and I try to justify your actions with that, but it still hurts. I can't believe that because of people like you, I can't even stop at a damn red light, without a bunch of kids in the school bus in front of me yelling things at me, making fun of me for being a "towelhead", oh, and having my life-threatened on the schoolbus, and if I hear the words, "they're so uneducated, he's not even Muslim" I'm gonna be pissed. Sure, you shouldn't stare at the Indian guy thinking he's a terrorist, and sure you're stupid cuz he's not Muslim, but just because I am, doesn't mean I'm any more deserving to be discriminated against. My mom won't even let me wear a head scarf in public, because she's scared of how people will treat me. I still can't feel comfortable looking at myself in the mirror, or wondering what people are thinking of me and my family, but I'm stronger now. So, when you hear me make terrorist jokes about myself, don't think it makes it okay. It's not. But this is who I am now, who I have to be, because if I can't make light out of it, I would barely be able to make it through a day. I will never be a blue eyed, blonde Barbie doll, but I'm also not a side-show freak, so you there, stop making me feel worse about myself, because you don't know me. You don't know my decisions. And no matter who you think you are, you will never understand what I've been through because of people like you.